The days to follow the death of Emmanuel before the Great Day of Rising, were not like the ordinary. Numbness had set in. So much had transpired in the past three years that each day of it had been marked for victory, but now was quiet. All was still. Followers of Twelve had no reasons for waking, but sleep had not blessed them. Thoughts of all the Words spoken by Emmanuel encircled the brains and continued making rounds of encirclement through the rough night. The Words wanted to be spoken aloud, but the heart of them was too grievous to utter, so a heavy silence pervaded. What does one do when one has tasted from the Kingâ€™s banquet and then the famine comes in one quick moment? Or how does one feel when one has a consuming love that makes the days of life, joy and pleasure, to wake and find it all a dream and you are more alone for the loss of what was had? There must be a remedy. Emmanuel was the remedy for everything; He would know what to do. Yea, He would knowâ€¦was the thought, which would bring great tears of loss, were there tears left them. Instead was left a hole, indescribable, going beyond grief. Emmanuel could fix the hole. He could fix anythingâ€¦and so the circle of thoughts went, with each round of words ending in nothing more and no remedy. Each of the Followers Twelve was left with the understanding that each had deserted Emmanuel before the life of Him deserted His body terrestrial, save one. [And Simon Peter followed Jesus, and so did another disciple: that disciple was known unto the high priest, and went in with Jesus into the palace of the high priest.
They had not taken advantage of being awake when He had asked for their company, before the Hypocrites stole Him away. But they were awake now, and where was His company. In His company was warm security of Promise and fulfillment and great joyâ€¦O mind, do not rehearse the joy for the hole left is deeper to feel then. Thoughts leave me! But they did not leave and would not in long days. Is there no balm for this malady of madness? Silence continued on long and still was it.
Meanwhile, Satan who had been Shadday kept to her own thoughts. She had thought and planned before but what thoughts should she be arriving to accomplish. She knew several things, but she did not like to think of them. Satan was revealed and no more could she be thought of as El Shadday. No more alimony from being united in the name of the Great King. She had no more share of it. El Shadday as Great Lord was now gone. She was just Satan the enemy of all and alone. She would no more be remembered as beauty or loved by the Greatest, but a two-bit harlot had by many and well worn. A thing to be cast out by the best of those Terrestrial was her lot. Not one to know the giddy love of a virgin bride without blemish and one to be admired. Her name was to be connected to everything ugly and vulgar. She was to be an existing repulsion from now on and forever not to change. This divorce was a sting and Death was still not in recovery from it, but there was no time to think of Death now, she must come to a plan. How would she win the human back from this event? But even greater, â€śWHAT IS THIS EVENT?â€ť Emmanuel had not just died here to be with the Great King. He cheated His moving and descended to the depths of Deathâ€™s prisons. Now what was to be expected when at first expectancy was false? She did not like anything, could not plan anything. She feltâ€¦weakened, but this would be her secret and she would keep to the act ofâ€¦had she been an act all of this time? No she had become realâ€¦had she not? Was her glee an act? She knew in herself what had defeated her was the love she had witnessed at the place called Skull and at the cross, named Shame. She had expected, as in any tournament, a look of vengeance puffing itself in victory, but this all invasive, yet billowing love was not a welcome thing to have sighted. She had been given that same look of it once so long ago that she had forgotten the taste of it. [Because thou hast not remembered the days of thy youth, but hast fretted me in all these things; Ezek 16:43]
Had she ever tasted it? Maybe she gulped too fast to realize how good was the meal of it. Love, it would not be hers and was gone and done away with. Now she was left with the kingdom she had created herself with the child Death and no one of loyalty. Her emissaries hated her for cheating them out of their inheritance and Death, why, were she a human Death would think it nothing to swallow herâ€¦O the thoughts. She could at least take comfort that she was no human creature, for when she would gather her thoughts and know her place again they would be the sorrier on Terrestrial.